How to choose the right greeting words. Example and basic principles

Communication etiquette should be taught from an early age so that later an adult does not have difficulties in communication. Of course, everyone wants to be confident and relaxed in any society or company. We all, at least deep down in our souls, strive to be liked, to attract others with our manners, appearance, and the ability to feel free in the most difficult situation. But it’s never too late to learn communication etiquette – if you have the desire!

Any communication begins with a greeting. According to etiquette, you need to greet a person with the words: “Hello!”, “Good morning!”, “Good afternoon!”, “Good evening!”. These are the most common and acceptable forms of greeting. Among close people, it is most often customary to say “hello.”

In a greeting, intonation is very important, warm and friendly, because even ordinary greeting words expressed in a rude or dry tone can offend the person you are greeting. And if you smile when you say greeting, this will immediately endear you to the person. Only the smile must be sincere.

Greetings are usually accompanied by a bow, a nod of the head, a handshake, and a hug. When greeting, you should not lower your eyes. You need to meet the gaze of the person you are greeting, otherwise the person will think that it is unpleasant for you to communicate with him, that you are hiding something, etc. When greeting, it is indecent to keep your hands in your pockets and a cigarette in your mouth. This expresses disrespect for the interlocutor.

There are different situations for exchanging greetings. There are some things to keep in mind if you want to be a polite person and not hurt the feelings of others.

If you notice an acquaintance in the distance (on the other side of the street, on a bus, etc.), and if you are also noticed, you need to greet the person with a nod of your head, a wave of your hand, a bow, a smile. You should not shout at the top of your voice - you will put both him and yourself in an awkward situation.

If you see a friend approaching you, you don’t need to shout “hello” from afar. Wait until the distance between you is reduced to a few steps, and then greet him.

If you are walking with someone and your companion says hello to a stranger, you should say hello too.

If you meet someone you know in the company of a stranger, you should greet them both. You should also greet everyone in the group you approach.

If you are walking in a group and meet someone you know,

it is not necessary to introduce it to others. You can apologize, step aside for a few seconds and talk with a friend. But don’t delay the conversation, because other people are waiting for you.

You should definitely greet those people you often meet, even if you don’t know them. For example, with the seller of the nearest store, with the postman, with neighbors from the entrance. This is basic politeness.

If you enter a room where there are many people, you should not greet everyone individually, but say a general “hello.”

When greeting people, they often shake hands. Here etiquette also pays attention to some subtleties.

The elders give their hands to the younger ones first, and not vice versa.

Among peers, women are the first to shake hands with men.

If two married couples meet, the women greet each other first, then the men greet the women, and then the men greet each other.

Before shaking hands, a man must take off his glove. A woman does not have to do this. However, when greeting noticeably older people, everyone should take off the glove.

According to etiquette, there are three main types of address:

1. Official - citizen, sir

2. Friendly - respected colleague, old man, dear friend, etc.

3. Familiar - dear, granny, etc. d., permissible only among the closest people

It is customary to address older people and unfamiliar peers as “you.” “You” is only allowed to be said to the closest friends.

If you need to address your relative or close friend, who is a leader, in the presence of strangers, it is better to call him by his first name and patronymic and using “you”. In this case, it is inappropriate to demonstrate family or friendly ties to everyone.

If, for example, in a team that is new to you, everyone addresses each other as “you”, but you are used to “you”, it is still better to accept the rules of the team than to dictate your own.

If someone calls you impolitely (for example: “Hey, you!”), you should not respond to this call. However, there is no need to lecture or educate others during a short meeting. It is better to teach a lesson in etiquette by example.

When telling someone about people, it is not customary to talk about them in the third person: “he” or “she”. Even about close relatives it is necessary to say: “Anna Ivanovna asked me to convey...”, “Ivan Petrovich will be waiting for you...”.

The way we begin communication with a person largely determines the future fate of this communication, so it’s worth following simple rules of etiquette, it definitely won’t hurt!

The younger ones greet the older ones first, men greet women.

A woman greets a man first if he is much older than her. Exceptions to this rule: the one who enters the room, be it a man or a woman, is the first to greet those present, the one leaving is the first to say goodbye to those remaining.

When there are several people in the room, they greet first the mistress of the house, then other women, then the owner of the house and the men.

When greeting a man, a woman should be the first to offer her hand. If she limits herself to bowing, the man should not extend his hand to her. The same between older and younger men.

A man always stands up (except for the very elderly and sick who have difficulty getting up), greeting both women and men. A woman does not stand up when greeting a man. The exception is that the hostess of the house, when receiving guests, always stands up and greets them.

Women also stand when greeting older men.

After greeting his peer, the man can sit down. If he greets an older man or woman, he can sit down only after they sit down, or with their permission. If the mistress of the house offers to sit down, but she continues to stand, she should not sit down. Keep this in mind when you have guests.

It is not customary to say hello across a threshold, across a table, or through any partition.

You can, of course, communicate in the usual way, without paying attention to all the subtleties of etiquette, if this suits your environment. But, finding yourself in another society, in another, unfamiliar company, moving to a new job or a higher position, the rules of communication should be followed. Sometimes too much depends on them: solving a problem, establishing the right contacts, doing business, or starting a long-term important relationship.

Greeting is not just a gesture of politeness. For some peoples this is a whole ritual. Usually the words that people say to each other when meeting, starting a telephone conversation, personal correspondence, etc., contain wishes for good, peace, health. Sometimes they express interest in how a person lives, whether everything is okay with him.

In order not to look like an ill-mannered person, you need to know how to greet correctly and behave according to etiquette during personal communication. This will allow you to show your best side, especially if you are seeing a person for the first time and their opinion about you is just beginning to take shape.

Etiquette

There is a whole system of rules on how to greet people.

It is different for every nation. Here they say: “You are greeted by your clothes, you are escorted by your mind”. In the modern world this is called "overall image".

In economically developed countries, it is customary to form an opinion about a person not by clothes and their cost, but by focusing on how well a person knows how to behave correctly when starting communication.

Residents of our latitudes are gradually moving away from significance "overall image", paying attention to the tact and upbringing of the counterpart, losing sight of his hairstyle, the correct selection of accessories, and the brand of perfume.

This applies to a greater extent to business circles. Considerable importance has been attached to etiquette at all times, but as a system of designated rules it was formed only a little more than 3 centuries ago. Some people believe that a greeting does not convey any information.

In fact, with its help the interlocutor gives a lot of signals:

Expressing respect for the rights and personality of the counterpart;
Positioning oneself as a person equal to the interlocutor;
Expression of desire and interest in further communication, regardless of the ultimate goal (business, friendly interaction, etc.).

Greetings from different nations

If you are going to meet with representatives of other countries, find out how they greet according to their etiquette. For example, it is customary for the Japanese to bow when meeting.

If you intend to visit Japan, remember that there are three types of bows:

For a long time, the Chinese and Koreans also used a similar system of bows, but nowadays representatives of these peoples will shake hands with Europeans and greet each other with their hands clasped and raised above their heads.

Close people in India usually hug. Men slap each other on the back, and women touch their cheeks twice. Residents of this country greet strangers by raising the joined fingers of both hands to their eyebrows.

In France, a stranger is greeted with a handshake, but if the situation is informal, it is customary to imitate three kisses by touching cheeks.

If in New Zealand a person touches your nose with his nose, it means he really likes you.

Don’t be surprised by the hot hugs of the people of Latin America - the “hot” representatives of this country give them to everyone.

In European countries, it is customary to shake hands when meeting.

How does this happen among Muslims?

It is worth studying the traditions if you are traveling to a Muslim country.

If salam is given to one person, he must answer. Otherwise, Allah will be angry, and the request for peace and health will not be heard.

When sending a greeting to a group of people, it doesn’t matter who says hello first, the main thing is that at least someone from the team responds. The answer to “salaam” must be received quickly, because delay without a good reason is a great sin.

It is not prohibited, but it is highly discouraged for a man to greet a stranger woman if she is not accompanied by her husband or other people. In this case, the woman does not have the right to respond to “salaam”. A woman is a stranger to a man if, according to Islamic norms, he can marry her.

The same applies to people who are busy at a certain moment and may not have the opportunity to respond.

"See you today"- can sometimes be heard in response to “Hello” with us. Muslims say hello at every meeting in order to cry out to Allah for peace and health as often as possible. This is especially true for families.

Salam is often accompanied by a handshake.

Greetings from the Jews

Their greeting is consonant with the Muslim one (“Shalom”, “Shalom Aleichem”) and has a similar meaning - “Peace”, “Peace be with you”. Recently, Jews most often use its short form (“Shalom”).

Depending on the time of day, people may say hello differently.

For example, if you need to wish good morning, they say “Bokeh of mouths”, good afternoon - "Tzochoraim tovim", evenings - “Erev tov”. A manifestation of politeness is the question “What do you hear?” (“Ma nishma?”).

If, when greeting, Jews want to show their participation, they are interested in how things are going with the interlocutor - “Ma shlomkha?” .

How do we do this?

The culture of communication in our latitudes also involves wishes for health or interest in how a counterpart is doing.

There are a number of nuances that need to be taken into account when greeting a person. For example, this applies to who should greet first according to etiquette. The younger one should show respect. The man is the first to express his respect towards a woman.

If she is sitting, she has the right not to stand up in response.

But if she is receiving a guest in her home, it is advisable to stand up. A woman who is in the company of a man should greet a woman who is not in the company of the opposite sex. Regardless of the accompaniment, the younger woman greets the older one.

In ancient times, a slave had to bow before his master.

Today, it is enough for a subordinate to be the first to greet the boss, but only the manager can initiate a handshake. The exception is a female subordinate, who must extend her hand first.

If two people of equal status meet, the question of who should greet first is not relevant - either of them can do this.

When arriving at a meeting or other type of work meeting, it is not necessary to loudly greet the audience. All you have to do is nod. The same applies to cases when you meet an acquaintance in conditions that do not allow you to get close to each other.

Etiquette dictates these rules to us, but why can’t we say hello across the threshold and is this a rule that cannot be broken?

You can not follow it if you are not a superstitious person. It has long been believed that evil spirits live under the threshold. Mystical properties were attributed to this part of the house; people tried not to “disturb” it so as not to anger the forces living there.

It is also worth knowing how to start a conversation with a priest.

They don’t say the usual “Good afternoon” or “Hello” to him. As a greeting, the priest is asked for a blessing. On Easter and for 40 days after the holiday it is customary to say "Christ is risen", turning to him, to which he will give a blessing and answer "Truly He is Risen".

You can greet the priest wherever you meet him, and no matter how the priest is dressed (in a cassock or not).

Knowing the basic rules of etiquette, you can always make a pleasant impression on your interlocutor, on the basis of which he will subsequently form his opinion about you.

Every meeting begins with a greeting. People of different ages, genders and status greet each other. Special etiquette words are chosen to greet the interlocutor formally or informally. When meeting, people wish them a good day, health, and prosperity. It is important to know how to greet correctly. Etiquette standards that explain in detail who greets and how in each specific case always help you feel confident.

How to say hello

Greeting is an important daily ritual in every person’s life. The ability to greet correctly indicates good upbringing and knowledge of etiquette. they prescribe how to say hello on the street, at work, at home. For each situation, special words of politeness are chosen.

How to say hello on the street

The standard situation is a meeting in a public place, for example on the street. You need to greet each other according to the rules of etiquette, which explain how interlocutors should greet each other.

When meeting on the street, acquaintances greet each other with a nod of the head, keeping a smile on their face. A polite man will not smoke and will take his hands out of his pockets. A woman may leave her hands in her coat pockets when saying hello.
only a woman can talk on the street. It is indecent for a man to stop a lady for a conversation. The only exception is an important matter that cannot be postponed.
A gentleman should not leave his companion on the street for the sake of communicating with an acquaintance he met. If you want to go up to a friend to say hello, you should first introduce him to the lady.
It is not customary for a man to attract the attention of a woman he knows who is not walking down the street alone. And vice versa, a girl does not stop an acquaintance who has a companion to communicate.
It is considered bad form to greet loudly when greeting people across the street or in public transport. A smile and a slight nod of the head will show respect. And it’s convenient to have a conversation by coming closer.
There is no need to loudly greet an acquaintance who is talking with friends. When passing by, you need to smile and nod.
People talk to strangers on the street if any information is needed. First, you need to apologize for the concern, voice your request, and when you receive an answer, thank you for your help.

It is important to remember the tone in which words of greeting are spoken. Kindness and politeness will help smooth out awkwardness caused by ignorance of the rules of etiquette.

How to say hello indoors

You have to say hello indoors more often than outdoors. Etiquette standards are intended for greetings in the office, restaurant, and when meeting guests.

Upon entering a room where there are many people, everyone is greeted with a general bow.
A man standing greets a woman entering the room and waits until she sits down.
When greeting a woman he knows in a restaurant or cafe, a man rises from his chair and bows. It is necessary to stand up completely if the lady approaches the table. But if his companion is present at the table, then he can stay where he is.
The lady, responding to the man’s greeting, does not get up from her seat. But the hostess of the house, following the laws of hospitality, greets guests standing.
If the family receiving guests has children, then they greet each adult guest standing.
It is advisable to say hello to strangers who meet every day, for example, janitors, sellers, postmen.

When you greet your interlocutor, you should look him in the eye, and it is impolite to look down. Well-learned etiquette standards help you earn the respect of others.

Three types of treatment

Depending on the situation, three options for addressing the interlocutor are used for greeting:

Impersonal address occurs when talking on the street, in transport, in a store. When addressing a stranger, they use constructions that do not name him: “Pass for the ride,” “Let me ask.”
For official representation it is necessary to use diplomatic, scientific, church, and military ranks. For example, Professor Ivanov or Lieutenant General Alekseev. In modern Russia, there is an official introduction of the interlocutor with the inclusion of a rank or position, but in everyday situations it is not customary to address oneself by rank. The artificially inflated rank of the person being represented puts him in an awkward position.
A friendly informal greeting includes such addresses as “buddy”, “old man”, “dear colleague”, “neighbor”.

Greeting options

To greet people you know or don't know well, you need to use different polite words for greeting.

Between close friends, any form of friendly greeting can exist: words of politeness such as “hello”, “hello”, welcoming gestures, hugs, pats on the shoulder.

When communicating with unfamiliar people, such a greeting is unacceptable. It is recommended to use the etiquette expression “good morning” when greeting before 12 noon, and “good afternoon” from 12:00 to 18:00.

In business correspondence, the familiar phrase “Good day!” is inappropriate. A more formal greeting would be “Hello” or “Good afternoon.” Next, add the recipient's first and last name.

They say hello by addressing the interlocutor as “You” only with relatives or friends. People who are older in age or position are addressed.

Accessories during greeting

When greeting a lady on the street, a man raises his hat. This etiquette rule does not apply to sports knitted hats or fur hats.

The military man does not take his cap off his head. To greet an acquaintance, he puts his hand to the visor.

The rules of etiquette explain how to say hello if you are wearing gloves. Men, when greeting each other, may not take off their gloves. But if one interlocutor, in order to greet at a meeting, extends his hand without gloves, then the other should do the same. A woman is allowed to keep her gloves on when shaking hands. It is unacceptable to extend a gloved hand to a lady who is completely without them.

Handshake

Shaking hands is the oldest greeting ritual. It is important to know the proper etiquette for greeting with a handshake.

There is a curious story about why men shake hands. An outstretched hand to the interlocutor is a symbol of peacefulness. In the past, this gesture indicated the absence of weapons.

When greeting the interlocutor, the woman decides what to do: whether or not to offer the man her hand for a handshake.
The hostess shakes hands with everyone invited to visit.
If a man sees an acquaintance standing with a group of people, he shakes hands with everyone.

A firm handshake, accompanied by direct eye contact and an open smile, builds trust in the interlocutor.

When not to say hello

In some cases, it may not be proper etiquette to say hello. This is what they do to show respect when they are afraid of disturbing a friend:

If someone comes late to a performance, concert or lecture, then enters the hall quietly, without attracting attention to themselves. You can greet acquaintances with a nod of your head, and say hello during a break.
If employees of the same office meet in the corridor several times, then you don’t have to say hello each time, but limit yourself to a smile or a slight nod of the head.

Special rules of speech etiquette have been invented for both greetings and farewells.

Farewell etiquette includes special polite phrases: “All the best!”, “See you soon!”, “It was nice to see you.” As with greetings, when saying goodbye, they shake hands.

When saying goodbye to one person, it is important to follow the rules of etiquette, which recommend saying how important this meeting is, what mark it will leave in memory. It is necessary to agree on how to meet again.

When leaving a party with a lot of people, you don't have to say "goodbye" to every guest. It is enough to say goodbye to the owners of the house, and just nod to the rest. It is impolite to explain the reason for leaving early in front of everyone. When saying goodbye, it is important to tell the hostess a few compliments about the party and the house. Thank you for your welcome.

Within three days after the meeting, you must call or write to once again express your gratitude for the meeting.

Good manners and knowledge of etiquette allow you to feel confident in any situation. The ability to greet and say goodbye beautifully distinguishes a well-mannered interlocutor with whom it is pleasant to communicate.

It can be quite difficult to say hello to a girl, especially if you are nervous around other people or if you are an introvert and never know what to say. You may not know the best way to greet a girl if she's your friend or if you barely know her. Maybe the reason is that this is your first date. Regardless of the situation, there are many ways to learn how to greet girls and still remain confident, appropriate and friendly.

Steps

How to say hello to a girl you know

Determine how close you are to each other. Depending on the closeness of the relationship, determine how comfortable you feel with the person. If you're close friends, physical contact is fine, but if you're not particularly close, it's best to keep it to a minimum.

Do what suits you best. You have to step out of your comfort zone from time to time, but when greeting a girl, the more comfortable you feel, the better.

Treat your girlfriend like you would any other friend. Just because she's a girl doesn't mean you necessarily have to act special around her, especially if you're in a platonic relationship with her. But we must not forget about common sense, so do not do anything out of the ordinary. You can start a conversation with a simple “hello.”
Use humor when meeting people. It’s not for nothing that people are attracted to comedians and funny people, because laughter helps to relax. When greeting a girl you barely know, use humor and you will show that you are confident (even if you are nervous) and not inclined to be rude.
- It is recommended to use humor when meeting a girl, as it helps relieve tension.
- If you're shy or nervous, you can joke about yourself to ease the tension and help her feel comfortable around you. Make jokes about your own appearance or the situation itself.
  - "I'm glad (mutual friend's name) invited me here. I was planning on watching Netflix all night, but this is so much better."
You should not delay your greeting too much. Sometimes the best impression is made by guys who say hello quickly, making girls want to get to know each other better.
- If you find it difficult to be concise in conversations, especially when meeting a girl, talk to her sweetly and unobtrusively. Don't try to force communication with you.
- If the conversation reaches a dead end, politely apologize.

How to say hello to a girl on the first date

Make a good first impression. This can be done by arriving at the meeting place a little earlier than you agreed. If you arrive early, you will have a few minutes to collect your thoughts and relax.
- If you show punctuality, this will be a sure sign of your maturity and reliability.

Etiquette requires greeting other people by following certain rules. With your greeting you need to demonstrate to people your good disposition towards them, as well as your good upbringing and culture. Let's take a closer look at how to greet correctly.

Who should you say hello to?

A well-mannered person should greet not only people he knows, but also strangers, especially those with whom he periodically meets. These are neighbors, store clerks, bank tellers, waiters in cafes, taxi drivers, etc.

What words to start a greeting with?

Depending on how well you know the person and what status he occupies, the greeting can be either as laconic and simple as possible, or emphatically respectful and official.

With people you don’t know well, it’s enough to exchange classic greeting phrases like:

Good afternoon/evening/morning!
Hello!

They greet management and people of advanced age, adding an address by name and patronymic. For example:

Hello, Alexander Alexandrovich!
Good afternoon, Natalya Filippovna!

You can greet people you know well, with whom you have no age or social differences, using simpler forms of greeting, including colloquial and slang forms. So, you can greet friends, for example, with the following words:

Hello!
Great, etc.

Only friends and relatives can be addressed as “you”. In all other cases, it would be more correct to address it as “you”, unless there is another agreement in the team. A simplified address to a person by name (without a patronymic), but with “you”, is often used. However, before using such a form, it is better to study in more detail the rules that apply in a particular social environment. If you want to move on to addressing a person on a first-name basis, you should first ask his consent.

Who says hello first?

The first to say hello is always:

Those who have just entered the room with those who are already in it;
Younger with older;
Men with women;
Subordinates with superiors;
Students with teachers.

Under equal conditions, the first person to say hello is the one who managed to do it earlier, or the one who turned out to be more polite and friendly.

How to greet a man and a woman?

Etiquette introduces clear rules on how representatives of the same sex, as well as representatives of different sexes, should greet each other.

Man to man. Usually they greet with a handshake, and the one who is younger or lower in social status (subordinate to boss) should shake hands. You can also limit yourself to a small bow. Students and teachers greet each other without shaking hands. If a man greets a person many steps above him on the social ladder (for example, a junior manager with the CEO of a company), or a man much older than him, then it would be appropriate to raise his hat or slightly touch it (this does not apply to other hats). ), get up from your seat. You can sit down only after the person suggests it, or after he has sat down himself.
Woman with woman. If the meeting is of a business nature, the ladies can exchange light handshakes. If you meet friends or relatives, you can exchange kisses on the cheek and hugs. If two couples meet, the ladies always greet each other, then the women greet the men, and then only the men greet each other.
A man with a woman. In most cases, the man greets first. If it happens on the street, then the man should pause a little, lift his hat or touch its brim. If a woman offers her hand in greeting, the man can kiss her. To do this, you need to shake your hand, lean slightly towards it and lightly touch your lips for a couple of seconds. Previously, such a ritual was mandatory for all gentlemen, but today you can do without it, limiting yourself, for example, to a slight bow.
Woman with man. A lady should greet a man first if he is higher than her in social status or significantly older. In these cases, it would be quite appropriate to even get up from your seat. Also, the woman is the first to offer her hand to the man for a greeting handshake - regardless of whether there are social or age differences between them.

How do people from other countries greet?

Handshakes and polite bows and greetings are used almost all over the world. However, according to ancient customs, some countries still have their own greeting traditions.

Americans may give you a friendly pat on the back or shoulder.
The French actively practice quickly touching their cheeks, while their lips make the sound of a kiss.
Eskimos lightly touch their friend's shoulder and head with their fist.
Polynesians rub noses together.
Thais bow in greeting by touching their faces with folded palms (as in prayer).